I’ve always thought of myself as an “influencer” but I have also been suspicious of books that claim to give me the power to “influence others”. Either it wouldn’t work, or would be unethical/sleazy, or more likely both.

I’m part way into an audiobook I picked up, called “Influencer”. I’m about 2 disks in (out of 7) but so far I’m pretty pleased. The material is clearly laid out, and seems to give great advice for things that actually work without being scritchy or evil.

So far, here are the highlights I’m getting.

1. Focus on changing a few key behaviors.
1a. “Few” – Target a small number of behaviors that you want to change, like “one to three”. Don’t try to change many things at once.
1b. “Key” – Attempt to find the right behaviors to change. Often, “best practices” in a field of study will already be known, but if not, look for “positive deviance” (where the problem should be found but isn’t) and test your assertions.
1c. “Behaviors” – Don’t describe the outcomes you want. Describe the actual, physical actions one will need to take. Don’t confuse means and ends.

2. Convince others to change their behavior.
2a. People learn new behaviors best through actual experiences. If possible, actually walk people through the actions you want them to do.
2b. People will resist attempts to change. Lecturing doesn’t work. Don’t try to convince/argue/persuade/cajole/preach. Focus on creating positive experiences.
2c. If you can’t actually lead a person through the actions, give them a “vicarious experience”. The best vicarious experience is watching someone else do the action and get a positive result. (Example of snake-phobic people watching someone else handle a snake from across the room)
2d. “show and tell” doesn’t scale as well either, so the next best “vicarious experience” is a Well Told Story. Storytelling engages a different part of the brain than explaining/lecturing. The story has to be told well and completely, and has to be believeable. The listener needs to identify with the character of the story and find it credible. (Example- Mexican soap opera that drives thousands into the streets in search of literacy pamphlets) (This is also why “anecdotal evidence” has near-superstitious power over people)

So far, what this is telling me, is that setting a good example is not enough — I have to be a good storyteller, and I have to tell positive stories in order to “change the narrative” in a few key ways.

The thing I would most like to change right now is my work environment. It’s currently quite cynical, and people tell stories over and over about why things are the way they are and why they can’t change. If I’m going to change the way the story unfolds over the next year, I need to start telling the right stories now, and engaging others in the positive vision I want in ways that encourage the actions we need.

I have a friend who is thinking about taking some courses to become certified as a paralegal. She’s heard that this might be a good career option but she’s not sure.

Are any of you working as a paralegal or have you in the past? Or do you know someone who might like to comment? It would be interesting to know what opportunities are out there and what kinds of jobs you might find on getting training and some kind of certificate? Does it suck, is it rewarding, what types of people/personalities do well or poorly at it, etc.

Thanks!

Posted as a comment to this post in but I want to save a copy for myself. This was a response to someone writing a paper about how atheists come by their “morals” and why atheists don’t just naturally become murderers and thieves.
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Hey everyone, it’s aelfsciene day! Here’s wishing you good friends, good food, good fun, and a designated driver, if appropriate. Be well!

Posted as a comment in but I wanted to save it for myself too.
I believe there’s a sort of cognitive dissonance going on in some cases, where children are taught that science/observation/experimentation/reason is a good tool for testing knowledge and understanding, and then taught on Sundays that all that doesn’t apply to God and related mythos. I also think that everyone’s reaction to it is different… maybe it depends on whether a child is taught early on to think, learn, solve problems and adapt, or whether a child is taught to obey and not question.

In my case my parents pretty much were agnostic so they didn’t feed me religion and just sort of left it up to me to decide what to believe. I was pretty much godless from the start. I attended a church in my teens but it was a pretty open, accepting “we respect all faiths” type of place. I liked it for its spirituality-without-much-mythos, community, and contemplation.

I got ordained by Universal Life, on the website, so I could perform a wedding for someone — instead of a Bible I held my leather-bound Japanese/English dictionary in my hand while solemnizing the union. Since being ordained I’ve become aware of how seriously I take my service to others. I consider myself an Atheist Minister. Just because I have no mythos doesn’t mean I can’t counsel people and teach them to connect with their own self-examination, conscience and wisdom.

Crap. I just showed up to a $VP meeting unprepared. I promised to do two important things, about the only things I promised 2 weeks ago, and I totally failed to do anything at all on them. So I got sternly “reminded” in front of peers that when I say I will do something, I need to do it. It’s not the first time it’s happened, either; both of my to-do items have had their dates moved a couple times due to previous failure.

I have recently had more work piled on me, which is a new kind of work. So far, I’ve sort of drifted along getting more and more behind, and only responding to something the second or third time I’m asked. A crappy way to do business, but so far I don’t know how to turn away/postpone work gracefully. Today proves that if I just do what people are clamoring for Right Now, the important stuff will slip.

I guess my main complaint is that I’ve got myself a shiny new organizer, and I’m still not organized. I am going to need to work longer hours for a while, or find stuff to stop doing, or both.